Kayaking Technique Forum

Find advice on all aspects of kayaking and using small boats on big water

You might need to see a therapist if ....

This has been making the rounds on email: _________________________________________

You might need to see a therapist if ....

- You paid more for a roof rack than you spent for your anniversary presents (combined).

- House guests ask you why you replaced your living room sofa with a sea kayak.

- You tie down the boat better than you seatbelt in the kids.

- "Waterproof" means "a little damp" or "might-float".

- You can't drive over a bridge without looking for water under it.

- The smell of old polypro doesn't bother you.

- Your wife says you love your boat and your boatin' buddies more than her, and she sounds just like your first wife -- and your second.

- Your idea of a complete first aid kit is a roll of duct tape.

- You use a river trip to wash sand and seaweed from your boat.

- You choose a new car based on whether or not your rack system will fit it.

- A dress shirt and tie no longer bother you, because they're looser than a drysuit neck gasket.

- Your boat is worth more than your car.

- Even in the the dead of winter, you never actually lose the PFD tan lines.

- Your dog loves to roll in your pile of paddling clothes.

- You're all dressed up and don't notice that your being rained on.

- You ask the clerk at Thom McCann how well these wing tips hold up to immersion.

- Every once in a while you touch your paddle, just to touch it.

- Every once in a while you let go of your paddle, just to eat, or something.

- You have no trouble saying "Rotomolded Crosslink Polyethelyne" ten times fast.

- You have a bathing suit that's wet from March to October.

- Your Mom has stopped saying, "be careful this weekend."

- You've never set up a tent when it's light out.

- You've ever tied up your mate using either a tautline or trucker's hitch.

- You have friends that you don't recognize without their PFD, paddling jacket, and spray skirt.

- You can ID make and model on a car topped sea kayak at a quarter mile.

- Your only consideration when buying a car is the size of the rain gutters.

- All career, personal and financial decisions are judged by the criteria of, "How will this increase my paddling time?"

- You build a two-car garage addition and you still can't park your car inside.

- You deliberately watch the whole commercial to see the kayak on the car.

- You find yourself humming Weather Channel tunes.

- It takes longer and longer to get your land legs back. Solid ground "feels funny."

- You change oil in the campground in the evening because you haven't had a weekend home in so long and you can'tafford to pay to have it done.

- You've lost count of the number of boats you have in your garage or back yard.

- You've gone boating in conditions where you normally wouldn't go outside.

- Your friends call you a "gear head" and you don't know what they mean.

- You've toyed with the idea of just leaving your boat and gear loaded on your vehicle.

- When you hear about a guy in a skirt you think nothing of it.

- The waterproof packaging your food comes in is more important than the food itself.

- You buy new clothes not by how good they look but by how fast they'll dry.

- You have to take out a second mortgage to build a new boat shed.

- You have an old Grumman canoe up on blocks in the front yard.

- You divide your life into work days and kayaking days.

- The bars on your rooftop rack are wider than eight feet.

- You have the phone number for Great Lakes Docks and Decks memorized.

Messages In This Thread

You might need to see a therapist if ....
Re: One Addition !!
Re: One Addition !!
Re: You might need to see a therapist if ....
You guys are just rookies
Re: You guys are just rookies
Second place finish
worse yet -- I've done it!
Re: worse yet -- I've done it!
Re: worse yet -- I've done it!
Re: i win,i win,