Jeeez, I laughed so hard I spewed wine all over the place!

: That doggone graphite is expensive stuff. I've been spending so much time
: paddling and travelling that I have not been able to start a new project,
: except fixing my friend's surfski. Man, those things have got a flimsy
: layup.

Amen brother! This whole carbon fiber and graphite prive gouge is pure rip-off. There's no reason to boost the cost 10 times, but they do.

I saw a Valhalla fold in rough, steep seas with a crackling break. I always knew that anything that bends with finger pressure was too light, but to see one folded makes me think they used a roll of toilet paper in the layup instead of glass.

: I was in Miami this past weekend. I was longing for a folder. They have these
: canals that look like kayak drag strips. I borrowed a kayak that I called
: "tubby." It was maybe 12 feet long and 20 feet wide. (Okay,
: obviously it wasn't that wide, but you know what I mean.) I think Godzilla
: would have trouble tipping this thing over. It tracked like an old
: inner-tube. I was wishing I had a long sleek surfski or even a folder.

Are you absolutely sure you weren't paddling it sideways? You know, point the skinny end versus the side? I find that they go easier that way. Hey, no need to thank me, that's why I'm here. Okay, I'm just getting you back for making me damn near choke to death laughing, that description was classic.
Those damn barges...I seriously think that the core element, the seven-levels below-basement-granite absolute fundamental core element of any huge ship like tankers and aircraft carriers is one of those tubby yaks. Float one of those babies into the drydock, lay all that stell on top, and there you go, insta-ship. Just add water.

: I also managed to get a $200 speeding ticket. Man, Miami's finest are not
: very friendly, and they don't like it when you say "I just happen to
: have some money here in my wallet if you would like to settle the fine
: right here." Hey, that was NOT a bribe... that was offering fast
: payment, right?

I see your point completely. Of course, the cop being a cop, America's finest and all that hoo-hah, probably got into a righteous ready-to-shoot mode. Not a good idea when they got the guns and attitude and radios and attitude and badge and attitude and worst of all, that attitude. Next time tell them you're Rob Pruden and out-of-control when you've sat in a kayak too long...that'll scare him!

: By the way, it was my first time back to the US in two years. It was like
: landing on the moon. It's kinda like they say blind people don't have a
: concept that when they leave a room that the room is still there... I have
: this concept that if I go more than a few miles there will always be
: water. Driving at night on the interstate was really weird. I kept
: expecting to run into the water.

Sometimes I think that a part of the country SHOULD sink into the water. Think of all the opportunities for the landlocked sorts to go ocean paddling, huh? I wonder how we can get LA to sink into the ocean? D'ya think there's a plug to pull?

: And not to go off on a tangent, but South Beach is off the hook. Man, mini
: skirts have shrunk a lot in two years. I have ties with more fabric.

There's those skirts running around but aren't nowhere close, not even in the same universe, to the mop of platnium hair and shorts sitting on the living room floor, who is right now singing a lullaby for our bunny (its "bunny bed-time now you see).